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Ghosts in the Stall, Again

Kisna Pande, Grade 12, Staff Writer


Amidst the bustling corridors and vibrant classrooms of HSAS, there resides a battleground often overlooked by many—the school bathrooms. While these facilities are meant to serve as sanctuaries of relief for students and staff alike, a sinister plot seems to be afoot.

The sentiments expressed by the HSAS community reveal a troubling reality. Likita Neksanov (‘26) remarked, "The bathroom always smells so bad. It makes me not want to go there." He cringed as he remembered his last experience in the boy’s bathroom.

His sentiment is echoed by Wachlan Lessler ('25), who adds, "It is a bit of a turn off. It is not a place where I feel I can do my business."

But what could be the cause of this foul odor plaguing the bathrooms of HSAS? Maintenance staff member John Johnson offers a clue, noting, "It seems like there is someone in there at all times. Especially in a big stall." Could this be a deliberate attempt to control access to the facilities?

Landrew Dith ('24) sheds light on a deeper struggle for dominance within the bathrooms, stating, His words hint at a power struggle brewing beneath the surface—a battle for supremacy over the most basic of necessities.

Further adding to this bombshell story is the observation made by Diko Dingensmith ('27): "There is always a cone in front of the bathroom. I don’t know why. I feel like something is going on inside there." Could these cones serve as physical barriers, erected to dissuade potential users and maintain control over the facilities?

Piecing together the puzzle, it becomes evident that someone, or perhaps a group of individuals, is intentionally making the bathrooms of HSAS less inviting, thereby exerting influence and control over who can access them. Whether it is through making the bathroom smell bad, occupying stalls for prolonged periods, or deploying mysterious cones as deterrents, the motive remains clear: ultimate control.

As the community grapples with the implications of this clandestine operation, one thing is certain: the battle for control over the school bathrooms wages on.

Will those seeking a reprieve from the stench and discomfort prevail, or will the perpetrators of this odorous conspiracy maintain their grip on power? Only time will tell as the scent of intrigue permeates the halls of HSAS.


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